CARD DECK - EMERGENCY AFFIRMATIONS EXCEPTIONALLY STUPID DAYS.

Emergency Affirmations for Exceptionally Stupid Days – Brass Monkey 😤💥💅

For the moments when you're one eye twitch away from flipping a table, Brass Monkey swoops in with 100 hilarious and wildly relatable Emergency Affirmations—the sassiest form of self-care you’ll ever keep on your desk. 💁♀️🔥

🧠 What’s Inside the Box of Sanity-Saving Magic:
• 💬 100 unique affirmation cards that range from inspiring to outrageously unhinged
• ✍️ Space on the back of each card to write down all the fabulous things the affirmation helped you conquer (like not screaming in public)
• 🎁 Display-worthy two-piece box that belongs on every desk, kitchen counter, or altar to surviving modern life

💡 Sample Affirmations You Didn’t Know You Needed:

• “You’re going to kick today in the nuts.”

• “The world is your oyster... even despite that shellfish allergy.”

• “You didn’t cry today. You’re a f***ing rockstar.”

🎉 Perfect For:
• Anyone living through late-stage capitalism 💸
• College students, teachers, parents, and professional chaos navigators 👩🏫👨👧👦
• Emergency gifting when someone looks like they need a nap and a scream 😩🎁
• Your emotionally unstable bestie (or… yourself) 😅

🎁 Final Note:
Whether your day has already gone off the rails or you’re bracing for impact, these cheeky Emergency Affirmations are like a loud, loving BFF who hands you coffee and yells “YOU GOT THIS!” into your soul. 🗯️💘💪